"Whatever my lot... it is well with my soul" we had decided.
"Lord, we want to be ***SET APART*** (gasp)"
......as believers, we already are set apart. BUT, did our lives showcase that. Did our children really see that in us or just hear about it from us?
We made way too many attempts daily to chase after the same things those running nearby were hungry for. To make sure we didn't have any jagged edges that might make us stick out from those headed in the same direction we were in.
In our hearts, we knew that some of the best lessons are in the "whoops, that was the wrong route," back up and start over kind of decisions. However, in our heads, we had a big need for things to make sense before we took the exit ramp when the flow of the traffic was not letting up the pace.
It was time to pound the pavement with what we had been preaching to the littles under our roof. We would follow whatever course He set out for us and not try to map it out ourselves for possible errors beforehand.
Our crew was growing up. They were all children of God. He had their paths planned out for them. We just needed to let go of our best for their lives and trust that they could hear from Him when He called out to them. But, how?
We wanted to be set apart, yeah, but let's just let the little girls cruise a while longer please. "Does it require them to be broken in places, too, so that Your light will shine through?"Yes, it does. Were we going to trust our God with that?
It quickly came time that this little gang of girls all clumped together were being forced to fork off in different places. From the beginning, they have always enjoyed nothing more than one another. They liked dressing alike, playing with same toys, sharing the same beds (despite their own rooms), all had the same favorite colors, and so on. But, now.
Now, one was headed into middle school! With that comes all sorts of very individual emotions, opinions and needs.
So, we committed to praying with her about what God had laid out that was best for her. We all agreed we would trust and be open to what she heard Him speaking. Great, perfect!! What a wonderful plan in theory. Right?
Reality brought answers. She quietly came to us saying she wanted to find out about a school 30 minutes away she had heard a little about. Hum, nope. No reason to look there. None of us have any reason or desire to venture that direction when life is happening all around us here.
She spotted a girl wearing a shirt with the school logo on it. She asked that we go over and talk to her about it. If you know her much at all, that doesn't happen. She barely speaks to anyone she doesn't have a comfort level with. She doesn't waste air on no nonsense talk. This was important to her and He granted her courage with the call so it was pretty cool to watch her approach this whole encounter. She liked the responses she got to the questions we asked.
I told her daddy what had happened and we agreed we would keep checking into it until the door was closed. We would look crazy for sending all 3 kids in different directions. We would be stretched thin making the "running" all work out. We had to choose what we wanted most...image or Jesus.
We believed the Holy Spirit was working in her. It was what we had been teaching and praying would be evident in our children.
It was time to allow her to walk it out. Time to hold her accountable and us to the faith we claimed as our own.
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Fast forward a year. She didn't falter. She heard from Him. She trusted His provision. With childlike faith, she entered a school she had never been into before, with children and adults she had never laid eyes on and into a school model that would place HUGE responsibility on her, as well as, me!
NOW, hear me....She had times she could have made better choices in her learning responsibilities, but she mostly stayed tight to the course. She got up, got dressed and straight to work even on the home school days. At the same time, some days she let go of the stress of lingering assignments to enjoy a run through an antique store or lunch date with mommy. She got to exert her very high standards of organization which brings her joy, yet false control (maybe she got that part honest passed down from a few generations above her, one day the Lord will have to break that in her too. Bless it). She learned to be both rigid and flexible. She taught me how to turn loose of the reigns and allow her to guide her own way no matter the consequence.
God was faithful. The year birthed such growth in so many areas of her little life. She gained confidence, made the sweetest friendships, learned the pains of not giving your all and the rewards of holding your feet to the fire. She and I strengthened a relationship between us that is so sacred. One I am fiercely protective of. The depth of it was gained through the hardest days which produced the sweetest blessings. Days where we learned lessons together that were never printed on a lesson plan anywhere. Lessons dealing with WiC vouchers, pride versus humility and, ultimately, surrender. Just to name a few learned in one day, in particular, that neither of us will ever forget.
Although reluctant at first, I saw Him deliver the promise to love and provide for us as a family, as well as, individually. I experienced His goodness through the sovereignty He showcased. Unbelievably, we had schedules that all aligned perfectly which only could have been arranged by someone knowing the bigger picture. He poured down all sorts of little and big blessings. In each and every one, His presence was thick.
Just think....I was anxious about doing it because of the weakness it might reveal if we failed. Or, the very worst fear of all. What if we didn't hear Him right? What if we were all wrong? What if we didn't hear from our Father and we are all alone in this?
It was the messiest sacrifices that brought the greatest treasures.
~Allow the brink of the unknown to birth confidence within your children. Allow the avoidance of failure to create a strong determination to succeed.~
As an amazing daddy friend likes to say...."never rob your children the JOY of relying on the Lord."
Today, I saw full circle the rewards of forking off the beaten path. Trust in your kid's faith. God speaks to them too.
Sometimes we might get it wrong. Even then, NO, especially then, the Lord uses that to draw us close.
Occasionally, we will hit the nail on the head. I saw glimpses of it this during our school this year. In the hard times, sometimes more than even the good times.
She walked up to the podium and began reading this letter she wrote to us. She kept it a complete surprise. She spoke with such poise and confidence even in front of a packed chapel of her peers and adults. It was a different girl than I dropped off last Fall. I am beyond grateful for what the Lord worked in and through her this school year. I shiver to think she could have missed it if her daddy and I hadn't trusted the Spirit working within her when it lead us to PPA....
Moments like when I heard her sweet voice echoing those words loud and proud within that chapel~
That's when we curl up in His lap and just cry tears of thankfulness.....
That's when we curl up in His lap and just cry tears of thankfulness.....
PPA, we will be forever grateful for what you taught our daughter.
The lessons beyond just school knowledge.
This smile is so genuine. The joy is evident. She was given the Kindness award..."never a harsh word to say about anyone and always a pleasant smile" says the director of the school. Yes, we will take it! So proud.
Thank you for teaching us all that sometimes different can be the very best way!
Thank you for teaching us all that sometimes different can be the very best way!
Adelynn~Fabulous First Grade in the books. This teacher has had both of my
"ends" and she is incredible in all areas...love, gentleness, academics, firm discipline and organization. Just love her!
It amazes me how its been one of the most spread out, hectic sort of school years we have had. Yet, the peace was always there. It was calm because we were each where He placed us. I am pretty sad to see it come to a close.
As much as I love summer, I loved thriving where we were planted. What will He grow in us next?
